Transition-- STIIIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLLLL............

Today was a little rough. As I've mentioned before we have been driving an hour each way to church each Sunday. We have to leave by 8 a.m. to get there on time. We didn't get up until 7:30 am last week, so this week we made sure to get everybody bathed Sat. night, but I forgot about gathering all their clothes. It didn't actually take that long to find them all, but it was just more than I could bear. I'm just running out of steam. We were very late again this week. It would be easier if we knew that we would get the lot we want and build the house we want on it to be in that ward and that neighborhood. I hate this uncertainty. I broke down and cried on the way there and held back tears when everybody was so friendly to me and wanted to know about us.

It's nice but it's hard to be so uncertain. I can't really tell them anything yet. It is a great ward, and they have all been really nice to us, but we aren't really a part of them yet. We can't move our records until we get our lot, and the builder/owner is being the same way with our new builder that they were with us- not returning calls, not making appts., etc. so it is moving way too slow-- it has now been 2 weeks since we signed with them and now it's Thanksgiving so we probably still won't hear from them this week. Day after day we wait, day after day, there's nothing new to report. Meanwhile, it's getting colder and snowier and later in the year. Plus the new ward isn't perfect. I'm very sensitive to picking out people's tendencies to be cliquish and mean and this ward does have a few of those. So it's hard to go, but I always leave feeling very thankful and glad that we did go (we did skip nursery and sunbeams though- the twins and the 4 yr old won't go to their classes without us-- we just drove around and talked/complained).

The other kids are very happy there. They all have friends. They all feel included and supported. I think the people are genuinely caring and kind overall, so we will continue going for the kids. It makes it worth it. I can hang on and keep going for them. I will just have to step up to the next level of organization again. I would never be well organized without all these cute kids. They have made me better than I every though possible and I guess there's still plenty of room for growth.

I do hope we will have something more definite soon. I hope we get that lot so that they can finally start the process of getting the permit and getting started on the house. Life is really tough sometimes. It's hard to fit everything in with all this driving. I think my cleaning time has suffered the most. I just have to make the kids follow through on their chores better. I think our new house will work out, but this is definitely the roughest transition we've ever had to make. Patience, faith, ENDURANCE. I will really try harder to not murmur.