Be Assertive!

So I've had to deal with some difficult situations and stand up for myself and say "no" to some unreasonable requests that were made of me.  I have really grown a lot, and I am really happy with the way things went.  I am really proud of myself, I may go into details later, but for now I want to share a book that really helped : 7 Easy Ways to Say "no" to Difficult People found here: http://www.amazon.com/Easy-Ways-Difficult-People-Boundaries-ebook/dp/B007Q13W7O

It has 7 different scenarios you may have to deal with in people trying to get you to do something, with examples of exactly what to say in each.  The first one is to not let them rush you, take your time to think it about it and make sure you want to help with whatever.  Another one is to think outside the box and find a solution that works for both of you.  Another one was to sympathize with them by saying,"yeah, that's too bad, but I'm sure you'll figure it out."  Another thing was to let there be silence and don't over explain.  There were a lot of other great points and the book was only $3!  So I highly recommend it.  I actually ended up dealing with about 5 of the scenarios last night with one person trying to get me to change my mind, and it went exactly the way my husband and I thought it would and I wasn't angry or mean or anything.  And I think it is now clear to that person, that I have been helping and that my expectations were not unreasonable.  But it really was uncanny how by the book it went, but that will be another post, because it was fascinating.  

I also started another book on being assertive, I don't think it's nearly as good as the one I just mentioned, but the first chapter was helpful and the following personal affirmations are really good.  If everyone felt his way about themselves, we'd have a lot less craziness!  A lot of the craziness comes from fear and lack of self confidence which comes from not being willing to admit failure or defeat.  So these affirmations would probably not work if you are not willingt o truly introspect and be willingt o face some hard truths about yourself first, and turn to the Lord sincerely.

I am a strong confident communicator.

I am worthy and deserving of respect.

I easily express my thoughts, opinions and desires.

I feel safe and secure about asking for what I want or need.

I allow myself to receive from others.

It's my right to say "no" and I exercise this right when I need to.

I am important, my views are important and my life is important.

I trust and believe in myself.

I feel for other people, but it is not reason to be taken advantage of.

I am comfortable and tense and difficult social situations.

These affirmations are good, we get so many negative affirmations, I think it's important to even them out with good ones.  I have also added My body is beautiful, amazing and healthy.  I am loved.  So far it has been helping.  Prayer helps and taking care of my body, treating it with the respect it deserves-- sleep, nutrition, exercise, etc.